Forgive My Blog

forgiveness opportunities

Note that this message is in response to a message from Marcy which is not included

Dear, sweet Marcy,

It’s a cool expression, but I suspect you of using it as a substitute for “evil guilty things that hurt me”.

If you truly recognised it as an opportunity you would have forgiven it.

And it also muddies the water about the meaning of forgiveness. You could just as well call it a judgement opportunity, since that’s how you use it.

The way I like (or liked) to talk about such things, is to call them “things about which my mind has not yet been willing to be corrected”. Long winded, but it points to my unwillingness, and to the decision making mind. And it implies that my mind will, at some point, become willing. It makes my wrongness in not forgiving, wholly apparent, but without self-attack.

I would absolutely love to hear you rant about telemarketers, cold calls, robocalls, without trying to look like a good Course student. Show us the hate. Plan murders.

Special love - the façade - is there to hide the hate, and the hate is a defense against the love. You can’t give up hate without looking at it. I want to look at your hate with you. Nothing would make me happier.

In the past I would have argued with J. I would have said “Jesus Christ, J, I’m not gonna say THAT” and then go ahead and say it anyway. But now, nothing. The only resistance is from old habits which crumble to dust when touched.

Freyr LePage wrote:

Special love - the façade - is there to hide the hate, and the hate is a defense against the love.

I made a mistake here. Skipped a step.

Special love hides special hate.

Special hate is a defense against guilt.

Guilt is the lie that protects us from the love of God.

So when you start digging, that’s the order of the layers you go through.

As you dig deeper, it seems to get grimmer in a way.

No one wants to give up special love because then they’ll have to admit that it’s just hate, and that brings them closer to guilt.

I have given up special love and special hate. I do not defend against guilt. I know I need no defense against it because I know it’s not real, but I feel it nonetheless. I feel guilt. Guilt without attack.

Come join me down at the bottom.

Marcy wrote:

Helpful hints are fine but stating how phrases work as fact is problematic in a group like this.

All I do is report my perceptions. Including my peception of how phrases work. What you do with my report is your business.

I used to be stricter about making that context clear, back when I wanted people to like me.

I used to be so concerned about what people would think of me. But now I just think “C-In.2:1-2 those who seek controversy will find it. Yet those who seek clarification will find it as well.”

I think it’s also, I’m not afraid of ‘ending up alone’. If my relationship with this group bursts into flames because I didn’t follow your rules, I won’t be concerned.

Oh wow, “x is problematic” is a story I am nolonger able to believe, about anything. Literally nothing is problematic.

To say that something is problematic, is to give it power over you, and to keep it apart from forgiveness.